Little One

Jenn & Jose's precious little Sophia arrived on October 28th. She weighed in at 5 lbs. 10 oz and 19 inches long. Mom and Dad are both getting adjusted to parenthood. Do we ever really get adjusted?

We go from feeding every 2-3 hours and diaper changing to rolling around and sitting up. We master sitting up to crawling. Childproofing awaits. They walk, run and learn. We are their teachers...somehow we have now become the know-it-alls and the master of the question children all ask "why?"

You now have a better understanding of the circle of life. What more precious to pass the path onto, but a child.

Patiently Waiting....

I guess I will not be getting any sleep tonight. Jenn called to tell me her water broke and they are on the way to the hospital. Baby "R" will be making her way into the world in a few hours. So here I am blogging to keep from pacing in excitement! You two will be fantastic parents.

Many years ago I found an incredible poem about childbirth. It is a poem I have never forgotten. Powerful...grab the tissues.

“A Child's Birth”

You learn a lot about living when a child is born.

You learn that pain can overwhelm and overtake and you wonder how your own mother survived.

You clench your fists and tear the sheets as life, entering life, tears your flesh.

And the moment you hold that tiny miracle, your heart rips open in a way you never knew before.

Your flesh will heal in time. You lie bleeding, not your flesh so much as your soul.

You know that every minute of every hour of every day you will be consumed with love.

And fear is the unwelcome guest that will ride upon love's new wings.

You touch your now-empty belly and mourn the life you once had all to yourself.

You hold this life, naked flesh to naked flesh. Nurse them to your breast,
rejoice that you can still provide what they need to survive....

You close your eyes and clutch their tiny fingers as they form to yours.

And in your heart you know that one day they will not be yours to hold
and you feel the tearing of your soul go even deeper.....

And again you wonder how your own mother survived.

How her sanity remained when her child was no more......

You learn a lot about living when a child is born.

— A poem by Delilah

11 Years

Happy Anniversary! To my wonderful husband....we have endured our share of troubles and triumphs. There is no one I would rather spend my life with. I love you!

Counting down

September has come and gone. I am grateful I can remember more of this year than last! The Breast Cancer 3 Day walk is a month away. I have had a few setbacks in my training. After battling fatigue, low grade fever and pelvic pain for 3-4 months, my appendix was taking out on the 9th. So with my tolerance being low, I was hit with the swine flu compliments of Maia. Feeling better each day, but I still get tired.

I may end up with a few more blisters than I was expecting, but I am looking forward to the event. Camera will be ready and tissues will be carried...maybe an entire box. My list of people I will carry with me keeps getting longer. I can no longer use two hands for the amount of people I know with breast cancer. October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Please feel free to feel your boobies!

Rich's mission

While I have been busy training for the Breast Cancer 3 Day, my husband has decided to train for a mini triathlon. With a good friend to push him to the limits....he ran, swam and biked his waistline off. His goal was to finish the event, even if it involved coming in last. He finish with lightning striking...literally! A storm blew in and the swimmers were asked to get out of the pool. After 3 months without a drop of booze, we celebrate at Legends. He can scratch this even off his bucket list. I can honestly say, this one is not on my list. My list involves no physical limitations....put me on a beach can keep the beverages flowing! I am proud of his accomplishment...did I mention he wants to do more? Now I am married to crazy!

Back to School

I am catching up on the months I have slacked off on writing. The Wilmots are back in lovely Indonesia amongst the natives. I miss they already. They had a great trip to Italy while we were starting school. Maia started 2nd grade. It is amazing to see how much she had grown in just a year. She has not only grown in inches, but in maturity. Maia loves to read and loves her books. I don't ever remember being that enthused to read. Encyclopedia Britanica here we come!

Another Goodbye

I am not sure if I will ever get used to the Wilmot's visiting and having to go back to Indonesia without me crying.

They arrived on Father's Day and left this evening. I guess there is never enough time with cherished friends. The "Bonnie" wine is gone, so I guess I should have known they would be heading back. The girls are "maturing" faster than we want to admit. Maia is not far behind. I look back at photos and see the "children" they were to the young adults they have become, Bonnie & John should be proud.

They are heading back to an unknown diplomacy of a third world country, Papau. I have more admiration for them than anyone I have ever known. It takes a certain person to move a family from "normalicy" to "WTF", is the only way to put it. The outlook on life of their children is completely unmeasured by any child raised here in the USA.

Break out the sarongs and koteka's....I love you!

Roots of Friendship

A few months ago I wrote about a woman I met in the doctors office. She was just about to undergo a mastectomy. I can remember the fear in her eyes, as I once to had the same blank stare.

I received a telephone call from her after I met her. She just had her surgery and was full of questions. Jenny and I talked for quite awhile. While we chatted about cancer related topics, issues, etc, it seemed as if we had known each other forever. It was a comfort you find in lifelong friends. I have often thought maybe life works backwards. You meet people at their worst phases in life to have things only get better. I am looking forward to many shared times with Jenny and Mike. They are a remarkable couple! We thank the both of them for a wonderful time at the Keith Urban Concert.

July Birthday's

Since Shelby turned a year on July 1st and Rich's birthday is the 3rd, we had one celebration. Shelby enjoyed her cupcake and Rich's face enjoyed the birthday cake. The kids get a blast out of squishing Rich's face in his birthday cake. They look forward to it every year.

We were delighted to have Bonnie, Kate and Sydney be there as well. They arrived back in the states on Father's Day. Thank goodness for skype or I would have forced her to take a weekend away to catch up.

Fundraising

Since Rich and I signed to walk the 3 Day, fundraising has begun. I have been lucky enough to reach my goal. Anthem Mobil 1 has once again stepped forward to do car shows, Save the Boobs was a hit and we are also collecting in front of Walmart at Happy Valley and Anthem over the summer months. The economy has hit everyone hard, but cancer has no economy. We thank each of you for all the support you have given us. The next large fundraiser will be October 3, 2009 at Ironwood Golf Course in Anthem. Hope to see you all there!

Dad & Karla's Visit

School is out and the grandparents came to visit. The kids enjoyed time with Nana & Pop-pop. Chase, Rich and Dad took a few hours at the gun range to test out a few guns. Nana took time to read and play games with the girls.

We sat poolside and watched the kids try to drown Pop-pop...always good for a few laughs! It was even funnier trying to watch Dad attempt to get on an innertube...love you Dad!

Dad and Karla treated us to a spectacular dinner at Roy's. The food, drinks and desserts were scrumptious(not that I am partial). After dinner we wandered around the resort to burn off calories!

All I feel we do is eat on vacations...isn't that what they are for? Jeremy and Jill cooked up a killer dinner on Sunday night. Filets are best done by Jer! Yummy!

Celebrity Fight Night

I rarely get the chance for many once in a lifetime experiences. Rich and I had our moment the end of March. I attended Celebrity Fight Night at the Marriott. John Bon Jovi was the headlining act, but the other musician were just as remarkable. All the proceeds from the even go toward the Mohamad Ali Parkinson's foundation. Reba was the MC for the evening. David Foster, Kurt Warner, Jordan Sparks, Forest Whittaker are just to name a few of the participants.

Afer the show was over, we headed back to Roy's for a post party. There is were I experienced my husband speechless and drooling for the first time. His dream came true to meet Reba. Christopher Rich, Melissa Peterman and Josh Groban were also there to socialize. I can't even put into words the evening we had, but we will cherish it forever. Thank you Bob!!

Mother's Day

Looking back at last Mother's Day, I was laying in bed wishing for death. This year I enjoyed a wonderful Mother's Tea at the school with Maia. She made an adorable bonnet and served great desserts. The children then did a skit about Mom's and sang a few cute songs. I was glad to be able to enjoy such an wonderful day.

I spent the rest of Mother's Day with my mother, Jill and Sue. We spent the day doing facials, pedicures and manicures. We made face masks out of yogurt, cucumber & mint. Soaked our footsies in buttermilk, lavender and grape seed oil. And then soaked in lavender infused Epsom salts....can you say no stress! The men cooked us a fabulous fillet mignon dinner and dessert. A great ending to a Spabulous day!

7 Year's

Maia turned the big 7 on April 21st! Rich and I took Maia and Olivia to Sweet& Sassy to celebrate. They received the full pampering. Pedicures, foot rubs, sparkles. They felt like queens. We then went to Sauce for a yummy dinner and ended the night with the request of Dip-N-Dots. They are growing to fast!

Birthday in PA

Yep, March 16th...I made it to 37!

Maia and I headed back to PA to visit my Dad and many missed friends. Gina, Terri, Chris, Liz Kathy and I enjoyed our garlic fest at Paolo's in Northampton. God I miss good Italian food!! What I really miss is the camaraderie. Stuffed and smelling like garlic, we headed to the Legion where time stood still. Conversations carried on as if I left PA last week. Bridgett and Butch are still heartwarming as ever. We reminisced about the old days and the craziest of times. Jimmy and Greg bicker like they were brothers...nothing a few shots won't cure! I wish I could transport them all to Arizona.

Terri and I took a drive to Schaeffer's Harley Davidson to say hello to Sven. He had no idea I was stopping by, so he was really surprised. Terri and I then decided to indulge ourselves with a cheesesteak at the Port Clinton Hotel. It was the biggest steak sandwich I have ever seen! Washed it down with a cold Yuengling...ahhhhh.

The following day I drove to New Jersey to see the Reidinger clan. The Reidinger children have grown! The last time I saw them they were all babies. They have all turned out to be beautiful young tweens. This was the first time Maia was able to meet the entire family. It was a great time for all of us. Cousin Richard and Aunt Stephanie even drove in for a visit. I must say...it was great to indulge in great Italian food...thank you Lisa and Scott for your hospitality. I wish we could all be closer, but we cherish the time we spent.

Sunday I spent time at the Adam's house. I really enjoyed just hanging with friends, laughing and catching up. Especially after a long year prior. Gina outdid her self with a great chicken dish...still waiting for the recipe!!! Maia and Maddy played until they dropped.

Not that I can ever get enough Italian food....Dad and Karla took us for dinner at their favorite restaurant. Maia had the experience to see REAL pizza being made. I had the indulgence of garlic once again......no vampires on this trip!

We spent the remaining days just hanging out with Dad and Karla. Maia climbed trees, not cacti. Nana let her drive the tractor and feed the fish. Fresh air will make you sleep like a baby before heading home.

Did someone mention Italian food?

Crazy!

It has been a crazy week! Rich ended up in the hospital. They removed his appendix, but the main culprit is diverticulitis. He is enjoying the king size bed all alone. My turn to sleep in the spare room.

Rich and I both joined to walk the 60 Mile Breast Cancer 3 Day. You can view my page on the right side. We will be walking with the members of Team W.I.S.H. We have many people we are walking for, in memory of and honor of. Elsie Toplak, Jan Toplak, Mary Ann Nicholas, Karla Tesch, Jennifer Slettebo, Sherry Cameron, Jamie Bravo are just to name a few. I am sure by November, this list will have grown.

I met with the breast surgeon on Friday. I will never need a mammogram or ultrasound since the tissue that is left is above my implant. Should I have a re-occurance, I will be able to feel the nodule by self exam.

Maia enjoyed her first Harley ride the other afternoon. Our neighbor, Todd, took Maia around the block. The last time I saw her smile that big was when she met the Princess' at Disney. Harley mama in the making....that's my girl!

Year in the Making

I sat in the plastic surgeons office yesterday and next to me was a woman with a complete glazed look over her face. She was reading an informative book the doctor had on the table. I commented to her that the book had great information in it. She responded, "It is a lot to absorb." She was having her mastectomy today. You don't forget the feeling of horror or the unknown. I can pass along hope and encouragement to someone new to the journey.

I toasted this evening with making it to my one year mark. As a Breast Cancer survivor, your first five years are your "danger zone" I hope the next four years go by as fast as this one did. I hope to remember the next four years a little better!

I have taken time to read. I have chosen books that are inspirational. I have found meditation to sooth the mind and calm the emotions. Time for ourselves is always needed and we often loose sight of our sense of "self".

Maia and I will be going back to Pennsylvania in March to see Dad & Karla. I am looking forward to seeing family and friends. My taste buds are seeking as many cheesesteaks and Yuenglings as they can handle! A possible garlic fest at Paolo's is also a requirement. The foods we miss.

Valentine's Day

February 14, 2009....One year ago today I was lying on a table having a biopsy on my breast.

I have made it to my one year mark, actually it is the 18th, but a few days short to celebrate is ok in my book!

We are going to enjoy the evening with family and fondue! Love fondue!

Happy Valentine's Day to all.

Marble Canyon Mecca

Rich and I rescheduled our trip to Vegas for another time. We packed the car and headed 4 hours to Northern Arizona to Lees Ferry/Marble Canyon. The weather was perfect for hiking on Friday and Saturday.

Before you get to the lodge, you must cross the Navajo Bridge. We parked the car and walked the old bridge that connects the gorge. A view of the Colorado River 475 feet below is not for the weak. The silence of the area left you listening to the river below. We were not fortunate enough to see the California Condors that live in the area. A couple we spoke with said seven of them like to sit on the bridge. Bummer.

We checked into the Cliff Dwellers Lodge. Stunning views of the Vermillion Cliffs. The rooms were clean,spacious and a great rate ($55 a night). The lodge caters to fly fisherman, so the front of the lodge by the end of the day is wader drying heaven.

The restaurant at the lodge is awesome. Rich had the best ribs ever! The ahi salad was a real treat. You have two food choices in this area. Cliff Dweller Restaurant or the Lees Ferry Motel. They cater to fisherman, hikers and any other crazy outdoors person you may encounter. The food must be good for the outdoors man type. The service was great and the company in the 8 table restaurant was friendly.

We hiked Lonely Dell Ranch on Saturday afternoon. The Loney Dell was home to families that operated Lees Ferry. It was really remarkable to think people lived in the surroundings the area posed. About a mile behind the ranch is Paria Canyon. It offers spectacular views of red rock along the river bed.

After our hiking, we stopped by the Lees Ferry Motel for some lunch. The husband and wife team working in the restaurant were so pleasant. They love the area and homeschool all three of their children. Their children have great opportunities to work with the river guides and anglers in the area. What an experience. Food and company were so welcoming, we decided to have dinner their as well. Two ribeye dinners please! They gave us a tour of the Lees Ferry Motel. The rooms were so cute. It is a definite stay then next time we venture north.

The silence of the canyon at night is soothing. We had almost a full moon to view, so it made stargazing a little difficult. The moon reflecting on the cliffs was something out of a movie.

As much as we wanted to hike on Sunday, snow on the cliffs left us wondering what the drive home would be like. It rained until we reached Flagstaff. Then the snow fell, and fell and fell. My last driving experience in snow was....was....was....11 years ago. I must say, it looked lovely, but I don't miss shoveling it or driving in it.

We made it home and refreshed. View the photos for yourself and image the silence.

Cut!

It has been at least a year since my last haircut and color. I guess the time has come to get rid of the skunk look.

The days of showering without shampoo, throwing on a bandana and being ready in a half hour are over. I had to buy a few styling products. I gave the ones I had away months ago.

Going from having no hair to hair has its own irony. I was worried about dying my hair a different color than before. Does it really matter...I had no hair! Hair color is like bandanas...they can be changed. A good friend of mine told me I should have dyed my hair pink...there are exceptions to the rule. I told her, "You first!"

Here are a few things to ponder:

1. Cowlicks are like the little tiny hairs that form on your bald head and poke out in the strangest places.
2. Hair product are cheaper than Mach 3 razorblades. And last longer.
3. Bald is beautiful....you never feel beautiful with a bad hair day.
4. If you don't like the cut, it grows back.
5. If you don't like the color, change it.
6. New hair growth is as soft as a babies.
7. Learn to wear hats, they protect your head and save the life of your hair color.
8. Never wonder why a woman wears her hair so short, she may have new growth from months of chemo.
9. If you ever have to be bald, let your kids color on your head. It makes a great message board. Washable markers only please.
10. Many consider their hair a part of vanity, vanity starts from within.

Getting closer...

It has been a few weeks since my fix it surgery. So far, cross your fingers, everything is healing well. I really hope this is the end of the surgical road. I had a few days of feeling a little down, but now that the drugs are out of me I am feeling a little better.

I had to purchase a few new bras to "support" the surgical procedure. Ask any woman who has had reconstruction about cup sized. You may need the larger size, but you no longer have the "sag" to fill the cup. They need to make larger bras, with the fullfilling roundness without the droopy cup syndrom. Task was not easy. For those of us with this problem, Vanity Fair seemed to be the best fit.

I have read a few wonderful books over the past few months. I highly recommend "The Shack". Jenn had given it to me for Christmas after a brief discussion about wanting to read it. It was incredible. A must read for anyone questioning the reasons of life. I couldn't put it down. I also finished "Roadkill on the Highway to Heaven" and "Dear God I am not Superwoman". I need to return a few books to Jenn's library and check out a few more. A friend of mine recommended Eat, Pray and Love. I picked it up at the library and will start that this evening. I have never been an avid reader, but I found it to be relaxing. Yes, relaxing, something Rich tells me I don't know how to do.

We have all been battling colds. Rich first, passed it to me and now Maia is sniffly. Vicious circle of bugs!

Rich and I will be heading to Vegas for a few days in February. Hooters Hotel has great rates, two nights for about $100. Can't beat it. We are going to meet up with a lifelong friend, Sven, for dinner at the Rio. I have never been to the Rio, so it should be fun. Good food and friends is always comforting.

We will also be cheering on the Arizona Cardinals as they head to Tampa for Superbowl on February 1st!

Little Droopy...

The new year has begun! I took time the other day to start a tedious project of going through my recipes, and put them in a binder. My recipe box was overflowing. I finished the project this afternoon. What a sigh of relief. I found a few good ones I forgot all about. Sometimes reorganization can spark the taste buds!

Weightloss is also on the list. Ten pounds is always the hardest. I was hoping to start yoga again, but that may be put on hold. I will have to stick to walking for now.

I went to the plastic surgeon this morning. My right side is still being stubborn. The pocket the implant is in had decided not to want to hold. The alloderm strip they placed in the cavity back in October has healed. It is the area under the alloderm strip that is not holding. So, I will be undergoing another outpatient procedure either this week or next week. Needless to say, I am a little droopy on my right side. My left profile was my better side anyway!

Pointer for woman...even with medical assistance, one side will always need a little help. Gravity will never be our friend!